BORING!!! Thats the only way I can describe life up here. Still on chemo, still have to haul around an IV pole and the meds.
I sense some folks are getting angry with me because I don't want to talk to them....not true. I don't want to talk with ANYONE right now. For the first time in my life, I am saying "hey, this is about me" and I have to save my energies to get myself well. I am choosing to talk with my family, and thats about it. This disease will most likely take my life, and there is no better time (for me) than right now to pull my family together and "huddle" about what is going on, recement our relationships, and figure family stuff out. I love my friends, but please don't get your feelings hurt if I'm not talking with you. Please put yourselves in my shoes and understand that this is week 1 of this diagnosis -- I need my family more than ever and I intend to hibernate from everyone else.
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Good Morning Beth,
ReplyDeleteWow, you are amazing. Your blog is awesome. We all care about you and want to hear your story and your blog gives us that opportunity.
There are tons of things that I have in my mind and heart to say to you, but really the most important thing that I want you to know is that I care and I am praying that the Lord gives you the stength that need for today. Your story has once again made me realize that we are not in control of our lives. And I just hate that, don't you??
This morning getting ready for work I pulled a necklace out of the drawer that I had bought over a year ago, saving it for something special that might come up, I took the price tag off and wore it to work today. Your blog made me realize the "TODAY" is something special.
Love Ya!
Cheryl Owens
Beth and her Beeper, a love Story
ReplyDeleteThe warmth of carcinogenic rays caressed his skin, the wind glanced playfully over his follicle challenged scalp. The day had begun. Karma struck and off the unsuspecting pair went for some liquid refreshment. The caffeinated kind. They entered the horizontally challenged people transferring device and hit the button for the ground floor. Abruptly the device stopped and the doors disappeared into the walls taking me mentally back to the Maxwell Smart days. By the way Agent 99 was hot, but I digress. Standing before us, a woman. She entered the cube shaped device and stepped to one side. I carefully, visually perused this person trying to obtain a mental schematic regarding her choice of attire as well as the typical male ponderings. Her attention to Beth seemed curiously entertaining. Sure I was taken aback by the fact this woman hadn’t so much glanced in my direction, but one woman of hundreds are my typical odds. Be that as it may, I was intrigued at her obvious interest in Beth’s chest area. Not oblivious to the woman’s stare Beth’s eyes turned to me as if to say “help me” in a voice of the fly from the “Fly” movie or a midget that just sucked down some helium from a balloon, take your pick. Yes, I am trained in the “Arts” but even my Ninja skills and cat like reflexes could not of prohibited what the woman felt compelled to do next.
The woman’s hand reaches out towards Beth’s bosom. Stunned at the events unfolding Beth freezes. For as wonderfully imaginative my mind is I could not fathom the accelerated thoughts coursing through Beth’s mind. I would akin it powering up an entire city at the same time. I skip mentally to the “Matrix” the scene where Neo is kicking some serious digital ass. The part where the action is slowed way down so one can appreciate the moment in all its glory. That or a turtle with emphysema running a marathon. I am talking slow. Surreal is the only way to actually describe the moment. For convenience or lack visual dexterity Beth had clipped her pager on the top of her blouse carefully nestled yet protected in the midst of her ampleness. I have thoughts regarding the placement and anyone that knows me, well let’s just say it’s a dark, dark street and leave it at that. This stranger apparently transfixed by this particular model of pager began to pet it. Yes pet. Ever so gently. I will have to assume she was electronically challenged as the pager actually was lame compared to most. A Pacer Wagon of pagers compared to the Corvette models used by the rest of the free world. Seeing the affection she obviously had for Beth’s device almost brought a tear to my eye. Yes, I do have an emotional side and this was a pure Hallmark moment. Was this stranger a bad girl last year? Had Santa forsaken her? Was it a clever ploy for some insidious hidden agenda? A man can dream cant he? Beth not a stranger to compliments took it quite well. She did look flushed with either excitement or pure terror. To this day I am conflicted. Beth, let me touch it once as well. I am breaking the “I wont ever tell” promise I mentally made to myself by passing on Beth’s near lesbian moment. I am however wrought with questions. Was it really the pager? Why me, why was I blessed to witness this moment of physical adoration between two women. Beth was trapped yes yet she stood her ground. Was it anticipated? Was she accustom to random gropage? Beth had indeed looked scrumptious that day. Did that give the woman license to paw her pager? I think not. Who am I to judge. Perhaps in time Paul Harvey will fill in the details for us.
Hey Beth,
ReplyDeleteI would agree that sitting in a hospital best is the MOST boring thing ever! You will get used to it. When I was in there, i brought in speakers to listen to music all day, Helped a bit. Don't you love how they wake you up at 1 am 2 am 3 am 4 am, everytime for something different! The doctors came around @ 8am, and they always wondered, why i slept so much.
Hey!
ReplyDeleteMy mom tells me that while I'm down here at school I have every reason to be completely selfish when it comes to everyone else. So, I'm gonna pass that on to you.
Hope to see you in Lowell when I come home!!